2005 - A Reflection

[ZapRowsdower]

Fantastic Four - Not nearly as bad as people are saying it is. Critics are being way too hard on it.

What I DID like:
-Strong cast, especially Chris Evans and Michael Chiklis carry the movie
-For the most part, decent special effects.
-Good fight scenes
-The Thing's make-up
-The movie's campiness (I believe unlike Batman, THIS was supposed to be somewhat comedic)
-Overall, it was very entertaining... which I suppose is what the movie wanted to be.

What I DIDN'T like:
-The "stretch" effects on Mr. Fantastic. With its cartoonish look and cartoonish sound effects, I felt like I was watching Who Framed Roger Rabbit.
-Mr. Fantastic's hair... the most inconsistent thing I've ever seen.
-Tries too hard to be Spider-man. Ends up being Spider-man lite.

But enough of the negative. I liked the movie, although not as much as I hoped I would. It never promises to be anything more than it is, which is an entertaining popcorn flick.

7.2/10

[Phoenix]

Thanks Smitty for the word on FF - no one I know has seen it yet.

I got a free movie ticket for giving blood last week so I think I may use it to see it this week - I love seeing movies 4 free!

[ZapRowsdower]

Dark Water - My last "free" movie.

What I DID like:
-The story never got stupid, so already it's superior to the Ring Two.
-The performances were just fucking great.
-The atmosphere remains creepy throughout the entire movie.
-Like the first Ring, it makes for one really good mystery.
-This is the first Horror movie in a long time to NOT use the Fight Club ending (and for a while it looked like it was going to). THANK GOD. And it was original, to say the least.

What I DIDN'T like:
-First and foremost, this movie just wasn't scary.
-Motorcycle Diaries director or not, Walter Salles really made some mistakes... well... I don't know whether to blame him or the editor for this, but it just seems that every time a scene has the potential to build tension, just before the scene has a chance to really suck you in and disturb you, it cuts to a shot of the building they were in. Once or twice would be forgiveable, but halfway through the movie, I was uttering out loud: "God, I KNOW what the building looks like."
-The movie, good as it was, didn't quite blow me away like the Ring did. Don't get me wrong, this movie goes leaps and bounds above travesties like the Grudge and the Ring Two, but as far as Japanese horror remakes go, this one was disappointingly forgettable, to the point where it's not bad enough to hate, but not good enough to love.

7.2/10 - Just so you know, the score is only this high because the actors were all so good.

[ZapRowsdower]

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Tim Burton has done it again.

What I DID like:
-Johnny Depp, brilliant as always.
-The return of the Burtonesque atmosphere.
-Danny Elfman's score
-Its cleverness, wit and sarcastic humor.
-The visuals
-The oompa loompas were very well-done.
-Tim Burton's direction
-John August's screenplay.

What I DIDN'T like:
-Remember the creepy boat ride scene from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)? This time around, it was disappointingly NOT creepy. It was fun, looked good, but not creepy.
-It didn't surpass the musical. But I'm biased towards the musical, so it could be better and I wouldn't even know it.

9.6/10

[ZapRowsdower]

Wedding Crashers

I haven't laughed so hard in a long time.

What I DID like:
-See above statement
-Vince Vaughn returns to Old School form.
-A shock comedy that still manages to be a romantic comedy at the same time. That's hard to do.

What I DIDN'T like:
-Since I HAVE to put something here... well... the director didn't do anything Oscar-worthy...?

8.5/10

[ZapRowsdower]

The Island

The critics mask their bias well... NOT.

What I DID like:

-All the actors were excellent.
-For those who liked Armageddon, it maintains the atmosphere by bringing a fine mix of drama and wit.
-For those who DIDN'T like Armageddon, the sex scene did NOT involve animal crackers.
-Scarlett Johansson in hot.
-Great special effects
-This is the first Michael Bay movie since the Rock that you didn't have to shut your brain off for in order to enjoy.

What I DIDN'T like:
-One scene, where they're on an "R" logo atop some tall building (it's in the trailer) ends very, VERY conveniently.
-The ending leaves something to be desired.
-Could have used a little more character development.

8.83/10

Bad News Bears

What I DID like:
-Pushes the envelope for PG-13, so this movie dared to be raunchier than most.
-Billy Bob Thornton. 'Nuff said.
-Unlike Kicking & Screaming, this WASN'T just another vehicle for Billy Bob to reprise his Bad Santa character, but the kids actually added a lot of comedy to the mix... probably even moreso than Billy Bob.
-They convey an important message without beating it into you.

What I DIDN'T like:
-Not as good as School of Rock.
-Not as good as Bad Santa.
-Not as good as the original.
-I kinda get bothered by the fact that it wasn't an original concept.

7.75/10

[Heineken Skywalker]

FANTASTIC FOUR & DARK WATER = 7.2/10?
CHARLIE & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY = 9.6/10?
THE ISLAND = 8.83/10?
BAD NEWS BEARS = 7.75/10?

Seriously, how do you come up with these scores?
I understand a 7 or a 7.5, but 7.2?? That's so close to 7, why not just give it a 7? And 8.83 is so close to a 9, why not just give it a 9?
You seem to have a very complicated rating system.
Just saying is all.

[ZapRowsdower]

It makes it easier to say which of the 7's, 8's, 9's, so on and so forth, I like better than the others.

The rating system I use isn't complicated. It's a lot like a teacher calculates grades. Take scores in different areas (usually Acting, Plot, Screenplay, Direction... Visual effects and original score if applicable) and then average them out.

[Heineken Skywalker]

iamthesmitty said:

It makes it easier to say which of the 7's, 8's, 9's, so on and so forth, I like better than the others.

I think if you give one movie a 7 and another a 7.5, everyone understands which one you liked slightly more without getting into all these other smaller percentages. And I think we all understand that just because you give two different movies a 7, doesn't mean that you liked them "exactly" the same.
I never got grades in school that were averaged out to these types of scores.
Seriously, if you want to rate THE ISLAND a 9, you should rate it a 9, no matter what the critics are saying.
To me, an 8.83 is almost like you're holding back so you can say that you didn't give it a 9. But I look at a score of 8.83 and I'm thinking, he liked it quite a bit more than an 8.5 and just under a 9. That's a 9!
Roger Ebert doesn't give movies 3/4 of a Thumb Up. Or 7/8 of a Thumb Down. Thumbs up or Thumbs down, baby! Don't be afraid to commit to a score, man. Embrace the inner movie critic within you.

Ah, I'm just fuckin' with you. Carry on! ;D

[Termination]

I still rate films with 4 stars. How old school is that? ;D

[ZapRowsdower]

Hustle & Flow

What I DID like:

-Despite the plot's similarity to that of 8 Mile, it manages to avoid being 8 Mile 2.
-Terrence Dashon Howard's SECOND Oscar-worthy performance... in the same year.
-Anthony Anderson proves he can do drama.
-Comic relief white guy NOT overbearing.
-SWEET rhymez, yo! ;D

What I DIDN'T like:

-Opening credits: Sorry guys, Tarantino did that already.
-Being that I have never been to the "ghetto", I found the beginning very hard to follow.

8.2/10

[ZapRowsdower]

March of the Penguins

What I DID like:
-Interesting concept, very similar to the Disney nature documentaries of the old days.
-Morgan Freeman's a fine narrator. Good choice, he DID win an Oscar for his ability to narrate. ;D
-The musical score was beautiful
-Gives penguins personality, much like Jean-Jacques Annaud did with Two Brothers. It was nicely done, too.

What I DIDN'T like:
-I didn't enjoy watching baby penguins die. Not a weakness in filmmaking, but it left me a little uneasy. Gotta preserve realism, I guess.

95%

[Pulpmariachi]

Hey, I just saw Bad News Bears and had a blast. My Mom complained about the kids cursing, but I thought it was hilarious. Just goes to show that kids aren't wicker baskets of innocence, huh? I agree with Smitty, not as good as School of Rock, but since it was Linklater I went into the theater wanting to like it, and I did.

***/****

Oh, I like the four star system too. Don't know why.

[ZapRowsdower]

The Devil's Rejects

I think this one might really mean something because I absolutely HATED the first one with a passion.

What I DID like:
-What an improvement!
-More Captain Spaulding, which is definitely what the first one needed.
-It's pretty much every Horror fan's wet dream.
-The actors are much less annoying.
-The premise is much more original, interesting, and exciting.
-The gore looked GOOD.
-EXCELLENT music selections.
-The tongue-in-cheek approach actually WORKED this time.
-A plot twist that happens so gradually that you do not realize it happened until some time after it happened. Not giving anything away, but it was so well-done. It was one of the best plot twists I've ever seen.

What I DIDN'T like:
-Some of the acting was still annoying.
-Rob Zombie seems like he's aspiring to be like Quentin Tarantino. His directorial technique comes across as someone trying to be Quentin Tarantino. I mean, he even used the trunk shot (coming from a motel ice machine, but the angle is the exact same thing).
-Some of the writing is awkward too. WAY too much usage of the word "fuck". And I use that word a lot myself.

Before I score this one, just so you can understand the improvement made over the first one, I gave the first one a 00%. That's as low a score I can give.

So here's how much Rob Zombie improved as a filmmaker:

72.5%

[Termination]

That percentage rating is a bit of an improvement.

Me philosophy: 0/4 stars means not worth seeing. 1/4 stars means worth seeing, but don't expect too much. 2/4 stars means worth seeing, but expect the average style of hollywood filmaking. 3/4 stars means worth seeing & won't regret seeing the film at all, near perfection. 4/4 stars means worth seeing, not much more than perfection of Cinema, enjoy.