The 2nd Annual Golden Asshat Awards

[Quorthon]

I thought the Golden Globe nominations came out before Munich and King Kong...

At any rate, History of Violence > King Kong 2005.

I just want to mention one last time that I thought that the whininess of the teenager in HoV was accurate to most teenagers. I only remember two kinds of teenagers: Whiney ones and assholes. I was an asshole.

It is good to see someone else that hates uber-racist Martin Lawrence. He's such a Bligot.

[Pulpmariachi]

The Golden Globes were announced before Munich I think, but it did get some nominations since it was released in 2005. Frankly, it should've gotten the best picture nomination over The Constant Gardener.

I hate Lawrence too, by the way. And Chris Rock. Simply because they are such racists but it's okay for some reason.

[Heineken Skywalker]

iamthesmitty said:

The reason Jessica Simpson did not get a nomination is quite simple: The Dukes of Hazzard did not take itself seriously. They knew it was just check-your-brain-at-the-door entertainment, and just ran with it. Natalie Portman's character on the other hand was on a really emotional, tragic, somewhat operatic film that in a way DID take itself seriously. And after knocking me out TWICE last year (Garden State and Closer), to see her give a half-assed performance in this film was a real downer.

And some good movies do have bad aspects in them. I address the bad aspects of A History of Violence. Notice I did not nominate it for worst picture (far from it), worst director (far from it), or any of the actors other than that whiny son of his.

Simpson doesn't get a nom because DUKES doesn't doesn't take itself seriously? By that token, you shouldn't have bitched so much about VAN HELSING being crap, since it obviously didn't take itself seriously either.
And how can you "hate" the screenplay to HISTORY OF VIOLENCE, but still think quite highly of the movie?
I don't know man. They're your "awards" and obviously you can do what you want, but I think your logic is flawed.

[ZapRowsdower]

Because A History of Violence has too many strong points to be considered just an average film. These strong points (such as acting, direction) are actually quite strong given the crap they had to work with.

As for the difference between the Dukes of Hazzard and Van Helsing, this one's gonna be tough... and you bring up a good point. The Dukes of Hazzard was a dumb comedy that didn't take itself seriously. It's like Zoolander. In a cases like these, it is possible for the movies to be funny. Van Helsing on the other hand, was an attempt to be like a film serial. That's why there were a few attempts at humor and Indiana Jones style action. Unfortunately, those were failed attempts. All this aside, the Dukes of Hazzard is not a film you watch for the acting. It's a film you go into, knowing it's going to be stupid, but not necessarily in a bad way. And this film was neither good enough to make any of my best film nominees, nor is it bad enough to make my worst film nominees.

And no, Ashton Holmes was NOT accurate. Not by today's standards.

And no, A History of Violence was NOT better than King Kong.

Now how about we stop sweatin' the small stuff and comment on the actual winners, huh?

[Quorthon]

Smitty, man, no offense, but I still think you just went to an oddball High School or something. I'm only a few... (counting on fingers...) 9 years out of high school. It can't have changed that damn much. It's just that now the kids are doing way more meth. Teenagers still whine and bitch, they're still assholes to each other and especially anyone considered an "adult." They still "rebel" while, ironically, still totally conforming to in-your-face popular culture and trends.

The only difference is that they do way more drugs now (I blame our increasingly, dangerously liberalized society stuffing marijuana use into every fucking movie these days--that's the starter) and have sex way younger. More to blame is (in old geezer voice) the MTV teaching teenagers to behave like little shitheads. They're still self-absorbed, they're still trend-monkeys, they're still whiney, they're still disrespectful to everyone around them. Same as when I was a teenager, a short 7 years back.

And I'm aware that I sound old-fashioned!

Oh and Cell Phones. They all have cell phones these days.

Okay, enough of that...

I didn't see Alone in the Dark, but as far as I'm concerned, there's never enough bad things to say about Uwe Boll. We should kill him now before some Hollywood executive stupidly gives him the rights to butcher a previously sacred franchise. Think it won't happen? Well, somebody gave perfectly good rights to two classic franchises to Paul "The Other Ed Wood" Anderson...

[ZapRowsdower]

Dude, a lot can change in 9 years... I went to a regular public high school, and true, many high schoolers were very much into trends. When I graduated, the infamous emo trend was just beginning. But our conversations weren't so simple. Our dialogue dealt was much more in detail.

If someone was a "faggot" (a word used quite freely in a History of Violence - also a word I've rarely heard used by my generation, much like the word "jerk"), there were few who cared. Times have changed, and diversity has become much more acceptable. Nobody started bullying another kid because the other kid beat him at baseball, during Gym class. It just doesn't happen. The teenager has become much more complex than what that film has portrayed.

I mean, Hell, I was the FAT kid in gym class, and I STILL didn't have to put up with that kind of bullying.

[Pulpmariachi]

...I just got out of high school last year, a public one at that, and there were examples of both cases. Hell, another high school came in with baseball bats and beat some kids into the hospital last year. I took bowling as my gym classes so I might've missed out on a bunch of teasing there. All non-academic clubs were shut down (by the school district) because one school wanted to have a gay and lesbian club.

And, my God, I've heard the use of the word "faggot," a word I particulary hate, more times than I'd like to count (I was director of our school announcements and that was like the only thing I banned in our studio). There was major disrespect going on that you had to respect the teachers for putting up with it. Cell phones are a major nuisiance (doubeled for college, but I can't really complain since I have one).

I don't know what I'm comparing it too since I still haven't seen the movie, but maybe you (Smitty) did grow up in a different high school, but the one I went to, in a suburb-like part of good old conservative Focus on the Family Colorado Springs, has loads of traits that Quorthon described.

Oh, plus rap music. Everything is set to rap music (except, thankfully our senior song).

PS. We had emo kids in our school too, but "emo" or whatever it is, has been around for awhile. It has recently gotten mainstream and trendy. I think a lot of them end up looking like depressed Beatles.

PPS. I also don't know whether or not History of Violence is better than the new Kong, but it's my bet that it wouldn't be that difficult. Okay, maybe it would but Kong '05 is very overrated.

[ZapRowsdower]

That may be the difference. I went to high school in Southern California. A gay/lesbian club would be supported at my school.

[Termination]

Damn, I really need to see A History of Violence..

Screenplay - some notes jotted down & pics of how the director wants to capture each shot or scene. Is that about right?

[ZapRowsdower]

termination said:

Damn, I really need to see A History of Violence..

Screenplay - some notes jotted down & pics of how the director wants to capture each shot or scene. Is that about right?

I think you're thinking about storyboards... the screenplay is the actual script.

[Quorthon]

pulpmariachi said:

And, my God, I've heard the use of the word "faggot," a word I particulary hate, more times than I'd like to count (I was director of our school announcements and that was like the only thing I banned in our studio). There was major disrespect going on that you had to respect the teachers for putting up with it. Cell phones are a major nuisiance (doubeled for college, but I can't really complain since I have one).

So I take it you're not a fan of Kids in the Hall?

I knew a gay guy (one of the two that lived in one of the two quaint little towns in which I grew up), and he called himself a "Fag" all the time.

Everyone has a different label they want inscribed to themselves, I guess.

For me, if it's not "American white guy" you can call me "Sexmaster Extremo Clitori Stimulatormeister." Anything else is un-PC!

[Pulpmariachi]

Yeah, I guess it's all personal preference.

I thought you were our "resident elitist metalhead"?

[Quorthon]

Felt it was time for some change. Gotta mix it up once in a while.

I was listening to Bathory's "Baptised in Fire and Ice" at the time.

[Phoenix]

iamthesmitty said:

That may be the difference. I went to high school in Southern California. A gay/lesbian club would be supported at my school.

Exactly.

This doesn't fly in the midwest or Texas.