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Post by ZapRowsdower on Jun 19, 2004 3:39:01 GMT -5
By the way, these threads are open for you to talk about the movies, what your impressions are, how you think it's gonna be, or how you thought it was. I'm trying to open various discussion threads to talk about new releases. Anyway, I have yet to see Around the World (in its entirety), but I've gotta say this is a tough choice.
Dodgeball was an absolute laugh-a-thon; one of, if not THE funniest movie of the year. It's stupid, it KNOWS it's stupid, and it works.
But then, there's also the Terminal. While not as comedic as the trailer lets off (in fact, the only funny scenes were IN the trailer, and it's not a comedy), I can see some Oscars headed in its direction. If not for best picture, then for Tom Hanks' performance.
And I still need to finish Around the World in 80 Days, but from what I've seen, in comparison to the shit Disney has sent us since last November, I think the critics need to drink a nice warm cup of SHUT THE FUCK UP. "It's not like the book." Hello! Did you just get here from a few months ago just before the trailer was released? How about telling us something we DON'T know, huh? Some people are too easily offended, methinks. Grow up. Understand that as long as Eisner runs Disney, this is the best they're going to put out. You're not going to get live action masterpieces like the Love Bug, so stop comparing. For what it is, Around the World in 80 Days is a GOOD movie... from what I saw. Arnold's cameo was great; too bad they showed most of it in the trailer.
So what's my pick? Choices, choices... Well, I like Dodgeball and the Terminal the same, but for different reasons. So as a deciding factor, I'm going with which film was OBJECTIVELY better, and that's the Terminal. Dodgeball, however, is a very close second.#nosmileys#nosmileys
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Post by LivingDeadGirl on Jun 19, 2004 10:57:20 GMT -5
Haven't seen any of these movies. But the only one I would be interested in seeing is The Terminal. Not really interested in the other two.
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Post by ZapRowsdower on Jun 20, 2004 3:34:58 GMT -5
I just finished Around the World in 80 Days, and let me tell you. You thought I was disgusted by the critics' responses before, you ain't seen nothing yet, because these assholes can't tell a good movie from the stick they have up their asses.
"Even the 1989 made-for-TV version starring Pierce Brosnan possessed more spark and steam than this lazy, lackluster take."
-- Robert Wilonsky, DALLAS OBSERVER
Lazy? Lackluster? First of all, an alliteration consists of THREE L's, so you have said nothing witty. And not only that, did we even see the same movie? I'm talking about the 2004 blockbuster starring Jackie Chan, which for the record was energetic, funny, and fun to watch.
"Around the World in 80 Days is modestly diverting summer fare, but at about the halfway mark you're going to start wondering, 'Are we there yet?'"
-- Mark Wolf, DENVER ROCKY MOUNTAIN NEWS
Speak for yourself, asshat.
"It's yucky."
-- Willie Waffle, WAFFLEMOVIES.COM
Yeah, that's really mature. Is this you reviewing the movie or a 3-year-old reviewing a piece of broccoli?
"It's not as classic as the novel."
-- Gerry Shamray, SUN NEWSPAPERS OF CLEVELAND
No shit, Shamray. However, I have also just discovered that Fahrenheit 9/11 is NOT based on Bradbury's tale, so I'm still one step ahead of you.
"(Owes) more to Verne 'Mini Me' Troyer than author Jules Verne."
-- Sean O'Connell, ECLIPSE MAGAZINE
Um... What? That's... That's just horrible. No. You're not clever. In fact, you're fired. Scratch that. You're under arrest.
"Feel like a future ride at the Magic Kingdom."
-- Roger Moore, ORLANDO SENTINEL
One can only hope.
"Despite all the audience-pleasing laughs and derring-do, it fails to take us anywhere we haven't been before."
-- John Monaghan, DETROIT FREE PRESS
What DOES anymore? All movies in our time period have to rely heavily on paying tribute or ripping people off. In case you haven't noticed, ideas for stories have been in the making since Ancient Greece. Wake up, asshat. NOTHING will take us anywhere we haven't been before.
"This $110-million fiasco is the sort of movie that gives family entertainment a bad name."
-- Lou Lumenick, NEW YORK POST
Did you ALWAYS want to say that? You should have used it on the Master of Disguise, Good Boy, Haunted Mansion, or Brother Bear. What are you doing wasting it on this movie?
"This is something slightly different, but only because it’s offensive at so many levels."
-- Eric Lurio, GREENWICH VILLAGE GAZETTE
Let me guess, you were among the people who protested against Bruce Almighty. Loser.
"If director Frank Coraci wanted to rehash Rush Hour 2 and Shanghai Knights, was there any need to drag Jules Verne into it?"
-- Christine James, BOXOFFICE MAGAZINE
No. It's a good reason he decided not to rehash Rush Hour 2 and Shanghai Knights. Watch the damn movie before you take a cheap shot against Jackie Chan.
"Basically an excuse to give Jackie Chan a hundred different places to beat people up."
-- Ed Gonzalez, SLANT MAGAZINE
If you want to look at it from a shallow person's perspective, sure.
"This comedy is billed as being 'based on the novel by Jules Verne,' but 'suggested by' or 'borrowing the title and character names of' would be more accurate."
-- Mark Caro, CHICAGO TRIBUNE
The same thing happened to the critically acclaimed "Count of Monte Cristo". Oh, and one more thing: DUH.
"Plays like a suicide note: full of references to past glories, past fight scenes played at half-speed, and an implacable patina of obliterating self-pity."
-- Walter Chaw, FILM FREAK CENTRAL
Please, let this be YOUR suicide note. We'd take THAT more seriously than if this were an actual review.
Around the World in 80 Days does not redeem Disney. Nothing can do that short of getting Eisner the fuck out of there and putting an actual member of the Disney family in charge. But this was a fun, energetic movie that, dare I say it, has that same Disney magic that we all grew up with. I definitely recommend it.
My vote still goes to the Terminal, and Dodgeball is still a close second.
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Post by Bartwald on Jun 20, 2004 9:29:55 GMT -5
Man, your comments are good! ;D
I'm interested in seeing all three movies but I predict I'm going to like The Terminal most. And since I hate waiting to vote until I see all of them - I vote straightaway, for my 'predicted winner'. If things change afterwards, I'll come back here to tell you.
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Post by Heineken Skywalker on Jun 24, 2004 12:45:29 GMT -5
I still haven't seen it, but I'm most interested in seeing THE TERMINAL. Though DODGEBALL looks pretty funny and is getting good reviews.
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Post by Heineken Skywalker on Jul 5, 2004 15:50:47 GMT -5
Finally saw THE TERMINAL. My mini-review is in the Spielberg section of "FAVORITE DIRECTORS". ;D
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