Three of the worst horror movies ever

[vaderfan]

The WORST horror movies ever are....

Now, remember, this is my opinion only. I'm not a frantic who's going to spend hours arguing online why one movie sucks and another doesn't and why anyone who disagrees with me is wrong. That would just be lame. But I would like to submit my list of some of the worst, most pathetic horror movies I've ever seen:

1. Darkness Falls...HATED it! Not scary at all. Not even bloody, really. Neither was Blair Witch, but it was at least creepy. Darkness Falls was a watered down attempt at a horror movie that simply flopped! And the tooth fairy wasn't scary, either. A weak attempt on that one.

2. Alone in the Dark...what can I say? Not scary, either. Just another "big angry monster hunting people down and spilling blood all over the place". It's been done so many times, it's become a cardboard horror theme. It's not scary anymore watching a big scaly, toothy monster chase people. It sounds desensitized, maybe, but it's the truth.

3. Boogeyman...one word: LAME!!! I spent half the movie waiting for this damn movie to get on with it already, and th other half waiting for it to become scary. Just like Darkness Falls, another watered-down horror movie that tries to scare us with spooky noises and "BOO" moments that Hollywood somehow thinks will make us jump when really we're just yawning.

Okay, I'll have to add more later. I'm being paged to make breakfast for my daughter )

Mike

[Bartwald]

Darkness Falls - yes, disappointing... but in my opinion it's still not the worst horror ever - the kinds of Wishmaster 2 win the title for me, especially when they ruin chances for a fine franchise.

Haven't seen Alone In The Dark or Boogeyman (the new version); I saw the original The Boogey Man, though, and always wondered why some people seem to like it so much - it was alright but "classic", "terrifying", "clever"? Noooo.

[frankenjohn]

"Darkness Falls" was absolute crap. Never saw "Alone in the Dark." "Boogeyman" was OK.

"The Other" was a terrible movie. So was "Motel Hell."

[slayrrr666]

Motel Hell was pretty good, Frank. I like it. Fat people being evil freak me out. That pig mask was pretty terrifying the first time I saw it.

I'll have to think about this one, but I know "Devil in the Flesh" was pretty dull, despite the constant nudity. I just can't think of two more really bad horror films I've seen. Q's warned me away from so many of them.

[frankenjohn]

I think the chainsaw fight at the end of "Motel Hell" is the only reedeeming factor. It was just so boring...

[Quorthon]

Among the worst:

Troll 2
House of the Dead
Blood Lake
Darkness Falls
feardotcom (forgot about that piece of shit didn't yah?)
Saw
Flesh of the Beast
Aswang (boooooooooooooring)
They
Amityville 4
Carnivore
Hell Night
The Hidden 2
Zombi 3
Howling III
Texas Chainsaw Massacre 4 (or Next Generation)
Children of the Living Dead
Dark Wolf



95% of modern PG-13 horror
98% of all horror movies with "Hollywood Elite" established actors.
80% of remakes.
Pretty much all of Stan Winston Studio's Creature Features.

That's all I can rumble off right now...

[slayrrr666]

Now that I remember Q's list, here's my three:

Devil in the Flesh
Cry_Wolf
FeardotCom

Thanks for helping out there, Q. I forgot all about the piece of shit known as FeatdotCom. I'm even deciding if I should do a review of it, as it was pretty fucking terrible. I saw it as a horror film, that's why.

[LivingDeadGirl]

Have to agree w/ Darkness Falls & HOTD....two of the worst.

[frankenjohn]

I liked "Saw (as you've all heard)," "TCM 4 (as a comedy)," and "Cry_Wolf (as a thriller)."

[slayrrr666]

I like it as a thriller, too, but the poll said Horror, and as a horror film, it sucks so much that I had to put that there.

[Quorthon]

What's Cry Wolf about?

[slayrrr666]

Cry_Wolf concerns a group of preppies who are bored at their private school, and make up a rumor about a serial killer stalking the campus, when it turns out that there is a killer stalking them. Don't even bother with it, Q. I'm gonna make you avoid one know. PG-13 slasher with no kills, no gore, plot twists for the sake of plot twists, WB friendly cast, and so mind-numbingly boring that playing with my watch to see if it glowed in the dark was more thrilling. Even worse, Bon Jovi has a supporting role that actually turns out to be a minor character in the film. Avoid it, Q, this one could almost be as bad as you say Carnivore is.

[Quorthon]

Oh man, that's really bad.

I mean, Carnivore is just ... indescribably awful.

I remember seeing this thing advertised now. It sounded familiar. Just took me a second.

Okay, noted. Cry Wolf is Crappy. Gotcha.

[slayrrr666]

Hey, you've warned me away from one, now I'll return the favor.

[Fenril]

Darkness Falls was bad, allright. A really wasted oportunity.

I have never bothered with "Alone in the dark" (it seems videogame movies just can't be done right) or with "Boogeyman". It just looked boring.

as for Q's list:

Saw, as you're probably aware, is not without its fans. But I'm not one of them; I found it to be a super contrived, really pretentious thriller. Saw II is currently being promoted as cross between Cube and Seven, which probably speak volumes about how far-fetched it is. See, Cube worked because the entire situation is nightmarish and we never find out why it happens (neither sequel worked, IMHO). And as for Se7en, I thinks this is one of those movies that are a hell of a lot better than they have any right to be. Enough with human killers who appear to be godlike, already...

quorthon said:

95% of modern PG-13 horror
98% of all horror movies with "Hollywood Elite" established actors.
80% of remakes.

I agree wholeheartedly. With a few solid exceptions, those are sure-fire formulas for crap.

quorthon said:

Pretty much all of Stan Winston Studio's Creature Features.

I'm confused. Movies featuring a Stan Winston creature or what?

I liked Pumpkinhead and Killer Condom quite a lot, but I don't know if either fits in that catetory (both star creature effects by Stan Winston...)

As for Cry_wolf, the plot alone sounds ridiculous, so I can see how it would suck.