Just Watched Movies (2014)

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Added uncut copies of Camel Spiders and Firestarter to the collection.

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Drive Angry-After escaping from Hell and returning to Earth, a man teams up with a young waitress to help him retrieve his granddaughter from a group of Satanic occultists who plan on sacrificing it in a deadly ceremony. This was an extremely enjoyable throwback-style exploitation effort as there's a lot to like here, especially once this gets going with the chase through the countryside to get the film going along with tons of exciting chases throughout here from the state-trooper shootout, the camper chase and the spectacular finale in the abandoned church which is really over-the-top and exciting. The shootouts simply add to the fun, with there's being a lot of gunfire and blasting going on which just makes for a highly entertaining and enjoyable experience that helps make the long running time seem to go by quite faster than it really should. The sheer abandon during these scenes makes for a thrilling time when allowed to go full-out with its' loose and free feeling, though there's a few small issues in here. The film's tendency to remove his supernatural abilities tends to come and go quite frequently which makes little sense as to why he would just ram through the cult like they were nothing in the few instances they get together, which means he really shouldn't have been around them in the beginning so that the final confrontation means a lot more. That could also do with the flimsy nature of the cult's introduction here, which is quite lame and doesn't really offer much as to why the daughter had to be sacrificed. There's never a word of why it was this particular infant or what their eventual goal would be, so this does bring it down slightly but never enough to hurt it.

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Tower of Evil-After finding a terrified woman on the beach, the police's attempt to find the cause reveals her involvement in her friends' encounter with a savage killer and tries to help them combat the bloodthirsty maniac. This was a highly enjoyable and entertaining effort that really has some decent parts to it. The three-part narrative here manages to make the film seem a lot more involved than it really should be, taking different feelings and cues from the different storylines to create a well-meaning whole that is wholly enjoyable with the latter two stories giving this it's best parts. The recovery of the girl allows the flashbacks to plenty of nude dealings here with the different couples being stalked and killed off while usually engaging in amorous activities that display plenty of flesh throughout so there's a lot to like with that being done while apart of the film's best parts of utilizing the setting to maximum effect. Placing pleasing eye-candy in a wonderfully-realized Gothic setting of abandoned ruins, fire-lit rooms, fog-enshrouded walkways and plenty of dark, creepy hiding spots to be watched over and jumping out from makes for a perfectly chilling effort in these segments. The third story involving the research team is a little cliched as it deals with the eventual appearance of the hermit-like creature as a total surprise even though it was used as a reveal back in the second one so the numerous stalking scenes here come off quite lame and counter-intuitive of what it's trying as it goes about doing all this set-up for a payoff already given earlier. Still, these are off-set by the excessive action and stalking done in the final half hour which is all sorts of fun with lots of brawling, traditional final-girl slasher-style confrontations and the ever-present Gothic trope of burning down the location at the end. It's all quite fun and really makes better use of it's screen-time than the rest of the segment as well as the first part of the film, which is just quite lame and confusing as it deals with the arrival of the hermit on the island and does nothing really enjoyable with it. Otherwise, this is quite enjoyable and certainly proves there's some worth to mixing the Gothic with the exploitation market.

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Train-Missing a train to their meet, a team of wrestlers from the US in Russia boards another train to get there only to wind up in the middle of a ring of organ traffickers using the train as a cover for their crimes and must find a way to get out alive. Surprisingly, this turned out to be quite an entertaining and enjoyable slasher effort. One of the best elements at work here is the extreme, bountiful gore on display which is quite a bit of fun as the blood flows through this quite easily. The nature of them being organ thieves makes for a great twist here with the body needing to be dismembered and sliced into in order to get at the special goods they require, and when the least painful method found in here is to take a bonesaw and slice through a chest cavity, there's a lot of really fun bloodletting on display which also helps out in other areas. The fact that the bloodletting requires plenty of stalking in order to capture the group makes for quite some fun times with the accidental discovery aboard the locked car, the search through the crowded cars and the abduction of each team member makes for some rather impressive moments here with this one taking on a lot of rather creepy scenes that aide along the bloodletting or in some cases actually getting it started. As well, the final half where they take the fight back to them and actually begin to score some success over the group is all sorts of action-packed fun and quite readily provides this with some exciting moments to really help this one quite well. There is some problems here, with the biggest being the complete and utter incredulity of the business they operate being this incognito for as long as it's rumored to be as it appears at numerous intervals to be a regular train service that they operate out of several cars along the way, and that tends to make for a very public sort of business that never really seems all that likely to be kept in the dark. Likewise, the fact that there's just no way to really find any kind of sympathy with them due to what they do to others makes the plea at the end where they reveal their true intentions all along quite awkward and lame, especially since there's little about what they're doing that is noble. As well, the fact that a group of collegiate-trained wrestlers would put up so little fight against the group makes for quite a rather far-fetched series of events due to the easy nature they're overpowered and rendered helpless, the exact opposite of what would supposed to happen to those kinds of people. Otherwise, this one is quite fun.

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Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon-Hoping for an exclusive look at serial killers, a film crew follows a fanatical killer as he prepares to slaughter a group of small-town teens before getting caught up in their ethics and try to stop his rampage. This was an utterly enjoyable slasher effort. One of the more impressive aspects of this one is the fact that there's plenty of utterly clever send-ups of what's at stake in a slasher film that aren't all that obvious which gets spelled out here. From the pointing out the clique that gets targeted to all the pre-attack tormenting that takes place around the town, training and working out for the chase as well as the behind-the-scenes planning for the whole event at the location and how to plan out a typical slasher-film style battle is all unique and quite original in concept and execution. Both of those areas are explored fully in here as the attempt to explain the thinking behind what is obviously a heat-of-the-moment type of situation that doesn't really inspire a lot of thinking when it really comes down to it makes for a rather engaging series of events throughout here as he goes about his plans. The actual execution of the plan, both in the early attack scene at the library as well as the ambushes at the diner make for some rather great stuff, while the big moment here is the actual final stalking of the group in the house as the crew attempts to help them deconstruct the evening before it happens as they try to stop him from going after the group and killing them which is all done in fine fashion with a lot to like here throughout this with a lot of explosive stalking, fantastic action and plenty of wonderful deconstructions of the slasher film norms that allows for a frenetic sequence that's tense, chilling and quite fun. While some of the stuff doesn't work here, namely the fact that this is supposed to be funny when it clearly isn't as the comedy instead comes from the absurdity of the situation rather than anything really done in the film itself so it can get rather annoying thinking this is funny when it really isn't, and as well the fact that the majority of the gore comes off-screen does get old a little fast. Otherwise, this was a rather impressive and enjoyable outing.

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Ernest Scared Stupid-It's not the holidays yet until this one gets a watch. Serious enough to be taken as a true horror effort but still kept in the realm of pure fantasy and comedy to not really matter, this is still a lot of fun. Does tend to drag a little more than I remember but again, it's not the holiday season until this one gets watched.

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Dead Still-Following his grandfather's death, a photographer inherits his antique camera and begins using it only to find a source of great evil attached to the camera and must find the reason why before it kills his loved ones. This is quite a fun and enjoyable effort when its' on, though it isn't that way all the time. Most of the problems stem from the fact that it trots out the tired cliche of the cursed camera but does nothing new with it, as if there's no other way to do a storyline like this without having to do the angle about those who get their picture taken end up getting killed. It's not a clever surprise when it happens, there's nothing new here about how it goes about doing this and it really tends to make the first half to this go along quite roughly. It also doesn't hurt that none of the other storylines are all that interesting either, about the affair between the married husband and his assistant or the rumblings about the divorce with his wife causing strain in his relationship with his son, and the times these are broken up due to the cliched moments with the camera don't make for anything interesting to happen. All that tends to disappear in the second half, though, when it really gets going by fully dishing out the goods in terms of how the relationship between the two evolves as the stakes get raised. Due to the discovery of the camera's true nature, however retarded it really is, that makes for a greater sense of danger when it all gets played out in the spirit world where it really takes a different, much darker road that really makes for quite intriguing and interesting viewing. With it's army of ghouls and demons alongside the fight for survival between the family members with the son looking on makes for quite a fun time as well as the fact that it's chilling and far more intense than it really should've been. This is quite nicely handled throughout this segment and helps to make for quite some fun times here when it spends as much time as it does here, with plenty to like about it. Coupled with some rather nasty and incredibly brutal kills along the way and it manages to stick in some rather impressive moments along the way.

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Dark Feed-Attempting to shoot a low-budget horror film, a film crew at an abandoned hospital begin to come under the evil forces that lurk within the building and must try to get out before succumbing to those dangerous forces. This is a rather disappointing and somewhat problematic effort that really should've been much better than it is. The fact that this one contains some rather impressive elements that should've made this one work wonders is one of it's better elements, as there's a lot to like here. The best feature is the hospital itself, which is par for the course in these types of films, as the look here is rather dirty, dingy and completely covered over with mold, dirt and years of neglect that has that feeling of being completely abandoned and home to abundant evil right from the start. This is the absolutely perfect setting for a film such as this as it absolutely looks the part quite well and certainly seems like the perfect place for somebody to go as mad as they go in here with the main part of this showcasing the staff her succumbing to the whims of the forces around them which really scores quite well here as this manages to feature the kind of actions and attacks that make for quite a thrilling time. The way it manages to include both the hospital attacking the staff as well as the group attacking each other makes for quite thrilling moments as well with this one delivering several incredibly enjoyable scenes in here from the impressive stalking in the corridors to the shock surprise in the boiler and finally the main chase through the different offices that's quite a bit of fun here throughout. However, there's still some big, big problems here that hold this one down somewhat as the first big reason here is the fact that there's just no real action at all in the story. The main focus here is on the movie shoot, itself a huge problem when it's all the behind-the-scenes goings-on without really showing what movie they were filming so it tends to just meander along with hardly any any real focus at all for the majority of it's running time as it leaves out all sorts of potentially interesting moments to spend with all the nonsense backstage dealings like their relationships and such that don't really have any interesting features about them while it just eats up running time. The fact that they're so clueless about the transformations and possessions that have afflicted their friends is none the better, making it seem like they're just completely clueless about the world around them and really deserve what comes their way simply because of what happens to them during the course of this. Finally, the cheap special effects on display really comes back to haunt this one as the deaths are really lame, not all that scary and are quite illuminated in how lame they really are very easily. Such a shame that these flaws ruin what was a potentially enjoyable effort.

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Dark Haul-Being transported to a new location, a Jersey Devil and his half-human sister see the trip as a chance to escape capture and lead the crew deep into their forested home where they launch a terrifying battle to save each other. This one's not so bad and really does have some decent parts about it. One of the better qualities to this one is the fact that it tends to not only utilize the grossly-underused Jersey Devil as a main creature here without really making sure that it brings about the film's few instances of rather dynamic qualities because of that. The backstory, as well as the interplay between the two due to their familial relationship, makes for quite a unique take on the monster while still giving off the traditional elements found in those movies which is where this one scores quite well. That also leaves the second half to become quite a bit more fun here with this one generating most of it's good action scenes with the full force coming into play here with a thrilling escape scene, numerous ambushes along the dash to freedom and the whole thing being augmented by the tense stand-off in the cottage which is where this one really comes into great use with a particularly exciting series of brawls with the creature as it wipes them out one-by-one while also engaging in the inner discord among the trapped gang who have her among them and the distrust she manufactures by being there. That continuing plot-thread, despite being on the biggest harms to the movie by clearly being obvious about her intents which cause her captors with supposedly plenty of experience dealing with her to look like the biggest bunch of morons for being so oblivious, here works in the film's favor by ramping up the tension in the moment quite well and allowing for even more good to come from these scenes beyond the high-quality action and body count delivered already. That growing distrust among the group towards her does cause this some good elsewhere as it provides plenty of action throughout as the requirement for her to be around in order to control the more demonic being allows for a lot of great confrontations here with the opening chase through the factory and the later encounter at the diner which turns into a somewhat-decent car chase gives this a really unique look while also giving off plenty of action throughout here. That still doesn't make up for the films' one big flaw, which is the aforementioned inability to make out how she continually initiates everything despite repeated claims to the contrary that she's on their side and getting everything started which causes them to look woefully ineffective despite having tons of experience guarding her. It makes this come off a little more stupid than it really should, but overall this is still a solid creature feature.

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La trajinera del terror-Taking a boat-ride with their friends, a small group of friends find themselves trapped in a strange land where several of their friends have become possessed killers and must rely on a fallen saint to save them. Overall, there's not a whole lot here that really works all that well for this one. The thing about this is the fact that there's just absolutely nothing of any interest happening here because the scattershot story tends to throw everything it possibly can into the story to make some kind of sense about what the intentions are in here. The story about the haunted boat and the trip into the rather confusing land would've made for a rather intriguing premise here over whether they inadvertently traveled on the wrong boat or other such luck, yet then comes the decision to make it about the discovery of the Quija board leading to the possession of the friends and how they bring the rest of the group into the strange land to kill them off. This of course is further confusing by the mysterious man-in-black shown to be traveling and stalking the group from the very start which is further proof of how utterly confusing this is. The discovery of the saint furthers nothing and makes even less sense as to why he would be allowed to inhabit that world if he can save the group from their misfortunes but it's totally worthless since all it amounts to is him looking at the camera funny and suddenly becoming filled with the wounds of stigmata, all the while everyone else just stands around and looks at him while they do nothing so this just eats up endless minutes of time repeating the same type of scenes over and over again and never getting anything really accomplished. Add to all this storyline confusion utterly lame stalking scenes that really should've been avoided due to their inherent inability to hide the stalker all that well, atrocious special effects that are none too convincing and a lame resolution that really makes the whole movie pointless and it tends to really have a lot more wrong than it really should. The fact that this one does have some good in the form of that travel into the haunted section of the forest and the confrontations in the church at the finale were actually quite enjoyable here and provided the basic framework for something interesting to happen here, yet the multitude of excessive flaws really hammered that out.

Crocodile Alert-When a supposedly endangered crocodile is accidentally-released into the wild, a scientist teams with a former crocodile hunter to help track the beast down before it endangers the locals while avoiding the hunter who illegally bought the animal. This was an overall enjoyable if slightly flawed effort. One of the biggest pluses here is the fact that there's a lot of time spent with a real crocodile in here, something that adds a lot of believability to the attacks and stalking done here by letting the cast interact with a physical being for once. Keeping the shots brief until the finale is also quite impressive at not overexposing the limited effects either so that they have a greater impact but more importantly allows the danger to come a lot more naturally with a realistic creature on display which is a great advantage in a creature feature. Likewise, those early attacks aren't bad at all either with a sparkling attack in the sewers while looking for several disappearances in the area and it even leads into a fine escape attempt from a car during the attack which furthers the action further. A secondary attack on swimmers after leaving a baited attempt to track it leads to some fun as well, and it all builds nicely to the finale where everything comes into play as the attack on the hideout leads to not only a firefight with the illegal hunters but also a lot of crocodile stalking and killing which helps it's extended length quite effectively throughout here. Otherwise, this one does tend to run into problems with the fact that the large majority of time is spent in here not doing much of anything. There's not a lot of attacks at all so the croc is kept off-screen a lot so it tends to feel like an afterthought to the two main human drama stories in the relationship between the hunter and his estranged daughter as well as his burgeoning romance with the scientist as they travel around the countryside with the reporter who's some of the most aggravating comic relief in the genre, and in the end this ends up leaving a large section of time without any attacks or action scenes to really try to reel in viewers. Likewise, the fact that this supposedly sets up the sequel in much the same manner doesn't really do much of anything at all in this one and comes off as rather lame and hackneyed to utilize such a finish, but it's more about how long and lifeless the scenes between the attacks really are here.

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Life Blood-After dying and coming back to life as vampires, two women try to control their advanced powers in a new world but can't escape their pasts as they threaten their secret life and their friendship and forcing them to choose life or death. Overall, this was a pretty decent and enjoyable if slightly flawed vampire effort. The main thing about this one is the fact that it tends to take an entirely different take on the genre which is not only wholly original but helps this one immensely by allowing this to take a different route through the story. By making the change occur as a result of a cosmic gift rather than a viral infection to be spread through neck-bites or blood-drinking, there's a different ethereal feel to them and how they go about being involved in the different confrontations takes a rather unusual turn here by keeping the remaining qualities of the creatures intact beyond this one simplistic change. That allows for some great moments in the diner where those powers are put into effect as there's the being impervious to bullets which makes for a fine shoot-out against the hapless officer, the superhuman strength which makes for quite an interesting brawl mid-way through where they get slammed through the surroundings to the point of breaking a normal human to pieces but they survive to continue the fight and even the burning of the skin due to the sunlight so there's the suspense of barricading themselves inside and how long that can work. As well with the plentiful and abundant nudity, these make up for some rather good times but it does have a couple problems with this. The most significant is the fact that the entire film is mostly centered around the diner so it feels way too stagnant and doesn't really seem like it actually does anything here which is quite troubling by letting scenes just go on and on just to eat up time. The fighting between the two is hardly all that original or interesting and these scenes are just maddeningly endless where one wants to exploit their powers and the other is trying to get her under control so they can utilize their powers for the better of their lives, and considering the amount of struggle that went into letting the one get imbued with those vampiric powers that really should've been seen coming quite early on so that kinda takes away from the burgeoning need to have to do that the film is clearly building towards. This does lead to a rather anti-climactic finale since it was clearly set-up from the beginning yet there's nothing really surprising about it, and when combined with the other flaws is a little disappointing.

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Added an uncut copy of Chain Letter to the collection.

Finders Keepers-Moving into a new house, her daughter's connection to a strange doll left at the house soon turns deadly when they find a series of deaths connected to the being and must try to save her before it's too late. This was actually quite a bit of fun and had a lot really going for it. The most important is the one that drives the whole film, as the doll itself is genuinely creepy and chilling with a defined look and air about it that really has the appearance of something malevolent out there. That goes a long way here towards making these actions all the more creepy and chilling by not only emphasizing what's going on but also doing it along with the notions of it being committed by a creepy doll. That this leads to several highly enjoyable scenes as the couple try to leave their apartment knowing that someone is in their with them leading into the final confrontation in the bedroom, the diner stalking and finally the big confrontation in the house at the end which not only adds a rather impressive amount of action to the proceedings so that there's a lot to really like throughout this. From the numerous amount of time spent here trying to determine if what's going on here is really just the doll or rather it's the girl committing everything, this subplot actually does a whole lot more than the rest of the film centered around the doll as there's enough life in this angle that it really does seem believable that one of them is the real case here which is quite fun and makes the film wholly enjoyable as it tries to weave all the different encounters that could provide such answers. That, in effect, leaves the film with a slew of exciting confrontations centered around a chilling main villain and augmented by enough creepy side-plots, actions and decent death scenes to make for a really exciting effort, though there's one rather big problem here that does keep this from a perfect score. Early on, the behavior of the girl towards her parents as well as people out on the town really should've been handled better so that it doesn't reek of ineffective parenting on their part due to how uncontrollable she is. There's numerous occasions where the parents were totally justified in at the very least slapping the girl or even providing a crueler source of discipline toward her to be more accountable for her, yet none of this really happens which causes them to look quite ineffective at their responsibilities. Otherwise, this one tends to come off rather well.

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Dead Wood-Heading out into the woods on a camping trip, a group of friends stumble upon a young woman looking for her boyfriend and agree to help her only to stumble into a far more dangerous situation than they ever realized. This here is truly one of the worst, most wretched straight-up horror films in the genre. The fact that this one is so amateurish and hardly ever displays any kind of professional approach and feel is one of the biggest deciding factors about this one's lousiness, as the low-budget feel to the special effects and the visuals about this one are clearly evident quite early and often throughout here. This goes to really hammer home how utterly abysmal this is during the few moments where it's actually worth watching by showing how low the budget of this is since the other rather troubling aspect of this one is the fact that it's just so dull and boring that what does happen here is barely worth caring about. The first near-hour of this one is spent with these completely unappealing people who just sort of aimlessly wander around the woods just not doing anything that makes us care about either couple here. Not only are they blatantly stupid about splitting up away from each other when they have incredibly accurate evidence of something out in the woods with them, there's also other such scenes as the women letting their boyfriends go skinny-dipping with another naked woman they just met earlier in the day, ignoring all signs of danger to hide out in the creatures' lair as well as knowingly throw themselves at someone when they're in the situation with a shapeshifter, and that's just the start of it all in here. The characters in here are just plain stupid and they're not in the slightest bit interesting, so placing them in a situation where nothing happens and when it does there's just no professional appearance to it all really works against this one. A few encounters are quite interesting, as the struggle to dodge the creature in the woods trailing after them as well as the drowning sequence in the lake while the centerpiece visual effect of a man being turned into a tree does have a rather chilling air to them in theory which seem like something that really could've been used as the basis for a much better effort than this one is for that's about all that this one has going for it.

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Tucker and Dale vs. Evil-Heading out to the woods, a group of college kids think the actions of a pair of lonely hillbillies is the work of deranged killers and tries to fend off their attacks to the complete befuddlement of the two guys. While there's a lot to like about this one, there's still a couple of overwhelming flaws here that does hinder this one somewhat. One of the biggest is the fact that this one tends to go overboard in trying to set-up the mistake about what they're doing to the point of total overkill and excess. While a lot of this is due to the completely unrealistic attempts to persuade the others that they're indeed psycho killers based on a backstory that's utterly ridiculous in it's own right, that's still no excuse for the excessive amount of time this one spends trying to hammer home the fact that the kids are wrong and jumping to conclusions about their intentions by utilizing some of the weirdest and most contrived scenarios to backfire at just the right moment to appear otherwise that they're right all along, and eventually this gets a little old as anyone with half a clue about anything makes the continuous mistakes about this. Otherwise, this here is a lot of fun with the fact that as a comedy this tends to get a lot right. The main point about this one is the rather naive business surrounding their good intentioned past that makes for a slew of incredibly hilarious situations here that manage to build quite a healthy backdrop here for the continuous mistakes to come forth. It builds them almost like a farce in the sense of each scenario seemingly fine in their viewpoint yet taken to a darker tone on their side, and the results nearly always hit their mark here with pretty hilarious scenes constantly involved. The darker tone they appropriate to it tends to allow this the sense of some pretty suspenseful moments from time-to-time as there's a lot of rather fine slasher moments here from the encounter at the lake to the first assault on the shack and finally the finale at the abandoned mine which is quite a bit fun with some rather tense moments, a dark revelation that comes to pass and plenty of action to really end this one on a positive note. Otherwise, it's really just the one flaw that keeps this down.

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- Annabelle. Prequel/Spinoff to "The conjuring", concerning the story behind a possessed doll seen in that movie. Here, a couple expecting their first baby, find their lives violently invaded by an evil force that has it's sights set on one of them and will stop at nothing, not even ripping off better movies, to further it's agenda.

One thing for James Wan productions (The conjuring, Insidious 1 and 2, Saw, Dead silence...), they know how to make an entertaining spookfest... unfortunately, in many of those the script itself is just not up to much, and that's the case here: most of the scares make very little sense in retrospective, and this is one of those movies where once all is said and done most the villain's actions don't quite add up. Whilst the doll is suitably creepy, the fact that it doesn't really have much to do with the actual on-screen action becomes frustrating after a while. It's telling that the spookiest scene, an attack witnessed from a window, has nothing to do with the supernatural, either. And then the whole thing is topped off with a resolution that is... problematic, but hard to explain without making it a spoiler.
So yeah, entertaining, but not really recommended.