Just Watched Movie (2011)

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1408-A writer of paranormal activities asks to spend the night in a famously-haunted hotel room hoping for another quick debunking of a tourist attraction only to find that it may be more dangerous to stay than previously imagined. Again, like most of King's efforts, there's something here that works (the concept of transporting the scenario of a haunted house into just a singularly room) and those concepts are impressive and generate some fine suspense from, including the ghostly hallucinations, the room interacting with him and transforming into several different settings intent on trying to terrify him and several different concepts that it plays around with, but it just suffers from an over-abundance of cliches, no real surprises and a huge heaping dose of melodrama that is unwanted, unneeded and just plain irritating to suffer through, which coupled with it's first two problems stand out far more than it's good points and leave this one overall mediocre.

Leviathan-An undersea mining troop looking for precious minerals accidentally comes across a strange compound that mutates the genetic configuration of whoever touches it and forces them to battle their hideously-mutated friends to get away alive. Not all that bad at all, definitely has it's moments during the later half when the creature's loose and begins to hunt them down, taking full effect of a perfect hunting ground for the creatures and letting them have some good moments in the stalking to derive some fine suspense, and the tactics of self-protection are certainly worthwhile, but this suffers from several problems. The most notable is the film's reluctance to fully embrace the horror of the situation and trying to keep it as classy-looking as possible, from a lack of screen-time for the mutants to the near elimination of gore during the kills and keeping it looking classy instead of revealing in it's horror-based origins. Some pacing issues and a really contrived story are also to be worried about, but luckily the make-up effects when we do see the creature make up for it so overall, it's flawed but definitely watchable.

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Nostradamus and the Monster Destroyer-A resurrected vampire taunts a vampire hunter with premonitions of his future deeds daring him to both stop his actions as well as rescue several children held in his possession. Not all that bad of an entry, but seeing as how this belongs into a series of films of which this is the second entry makes the story a little weird to follow, as it both starts off in the middle of an action scene and ends with a cliffhanger to set up the next one, so it's a bit confusing to make sense of it all what with his motivations being somewhat clouded (or maybe that's just the Spanish language) and the film centering more on everyone talking about trying to stop him rather than springing to action so it's a bit of a lag in the middle segments. Even still, the Gothic castle where he hides out is really atmospheric, it allows for some nice suspenseful stalking scenes as a hunchback chases the escaping kids through the catacombs of the basement and the scenes in the morgue with the reviving victim are pretty chilling. All in all, it's not a bad entry.

Marina: On the Other Side of Time-A tormented teen finds that the ghosts living in her new house are urging her on to help solve a grisly mystery involving a secret between her divorcing parents. Frankly, this is the one film in the entire marathon I'm a little unsure about since it was the only one I saw without closed-captioning, which the others supplied so I think I missed a lot of what's going on in here, so the story above might be somewhat off from what's actually going on yet it's the best I can offer based on the limited amount of Spanish I've been picking up from watching these films. Even with the story problems, the age of the heroine and the action contained within make it out to be a kid's horror film and it clearly shows it, with the bad CGI for the ghosts not moving at all yet floating within the scene, the disembodied voices and lack of anything gory or bloody clearly have this one intended for the younger audiences, so with the lack of help from the story I really can't say much more about it.

Night of a 1000 Cats-A playboy aristocrat tries to romance several women around the town, yet when his advances are spurned, brings them back to his castle to feed to his basement filled with flesh-eating cats. Superb Mexican exploitation effort, filled with lots of nudity, some what-should-be arrogant speeches from the main guy about getting away with it all and just the general nature of the storyline, about the tactics he uses and the toys he plays with in order to do everything he does around the city, so despite the lack of real action since it's pretty slow-going, it's still a good bit of fun. The castle is again a grand Gothic masterpiece, filled with the cramped rooms, candle-lit walkways and brick architecture that's always featured in these films, and with the cats coming into play more in the second half, it adds an extra bit of spice into the proceedings what with them getting loose and chasing after the victims causing a suspenseful chase to get out. Needed a bit more action during the second half when he's trying to lure the women back, but it's not all that bad at all.

Capulina Against the Mummies (The Terror of Guanajuato)-A bumbling taxi driver takes a man to visit his scientist friend in a small town, where he unknowingly comes across his secret experiments trying to bring the collections of mummies buried nearby back to life. Not nearly as madly funny as the previous Capulina effort I've seen, even though this one manages to get a bit more serious in offering a horror tone to compensate even though it's still got some good solid laughs to it. I get the feeling it's more about wordplay and one-liners than the slapstick which is where the level of humor is balanced, so most is lost in translation, yet again the horror elements brought forth are really nice in that the mummies look really cool, the incorporation of the mad scientist subplot allows for some fun and it's not really a boring effort, leaving this one slightly lower yet still highly enjoyable.

The Resuscitated Monster-A disfigured scientist tries to win over a journalist trying to uncover a story about a deceased man rumored to be alive that turns out to be the handiwork of the scientist seeking revenge on the medical community who scorned him. Really great Frankenstein adaptation that manages to get a lot right while also having very few things wrong with it. The most obvious flaw is the storyline, which is just plain odd and doesn't really offer much to make it make sense so it tends to ramble along without really being realistic or coherent, and the copying of several foreign horrors at the time are a little obvious, yet this is still a lot of fun. From the low-budget, since the deformed scientist is so ludicrous looking it's almost laughable throughout his scenes despite trying to appear threatening, the foggy landscapes that surround everything and the inclusion of some nice action scenes throughout, it's quite enjoyable when it wants to be.

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Evilution-A military scientist trying to learn more about a strange alien virus moves into a run-down suburban apartment complex to study it, but when it gets released upon the inhabitants and turns them into flesh-devouring zombies, he races to stop them before they can escape the building into the city. Not all that bad at all, and actually a fairly decent effort in it's own right, helped along by a fairly novel idea of letting the zombie reanimation come from an alien organism rather than anything else and in a sense possessing the victim to continue living so that they can learn about the human race, but only by consuming the flesh of their victims. Pretty unique, as well as the method of disposing of the creatures, which is pretty original and clever and allows for some good times later on. They look pretty good as well and manage to get in some pretty gory stuff here and there, although their behavior of mimicking the infected (i.e.: running zombies) is terribly handled. Plus, it waits far too long to get going with it's life-is-hard-in-the-projects opening that holds off the zombie mayhem, but overall its not that bad.

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The Heroic Trio-Three female crime-fighters band together to stop a diabolical mastermind kidnapping infants to use as the potential heir to housing a demonic being being reborn into the world. Really enjoyable and rousing kung-fu effort, filled with some great battle scenes where the women are allowed to showcase their stuff and it delivers, whether it's battling amongst each other before breaking a brainwashed member from the villain's hold or against the henchmen before the final battle, and even comes complete with some shoot-outs and a chase scene mixed in to allow for more action set-pieces. Given a unique Asian touch that no US film would ever go for (placing infant abduction, injury and even death at the forefront of the story seems so out-of-place with homeland films that using it here, while not gratuitous, seems like a logical move concerning what's going on in the story) and given a fairly enjoyable pace, allows for some good times to be had.

Fist of the Red Dragon-A young fighter addicted to opium is saved by a masterful kung-fu artist and joins him on a quest to stop the corrupt governor conspiring with a deadly society attempting to run over the society filled with it's enemies. Absolutely enjoyable and thrilling kung-fu epic, perhaps one of the more overlooked films in the style but filled with some of it's best fighting scenes ever, throwing in a ton of them as well so it's almost nearly a wall-to-wall film with no let-up, and the dizzying display and quality of fights leads to this one being enjoyable nearly throughout. With a lot of credible fighters each being allowed to have the center stage and not just the main heroes, that extra jolt allows everyone to have a share and look good, which is also always a plus here. Tends to be a familiar plotline I've seen in these films, but it's not a concern when the action is this spectacular.

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Deadlands 2: Trapped-The residents of a small Maryland town find themselves stuck in a movie theater after the military conducts a test on a new virus that turns the residents into flesh-hungry zombies, forcing them to find a way out before being killed. A decent low-budget zombie actioner, it does have some good stuff going for it in the sense of a claustrophobic space being used to good effect, some nifty action scenes with a swarm of the creatures running loose attacking at the same time, and there's some good enough gore to count among the pervasive amount of these types of zombie movies. However, it still suffers from several rather big flaws, in that the zombies look utterly terrible when we do get to see them since it's always so dark it's hard to make out anything with any certainty, the zombie action is nice when it happens, but it's far too infrequent than what it should be and the finale is just plain terrible. Really needed work, but it's a decent enough film as is.

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Dead Heat-A police officer is accidentally killed while on a special case involving supposed criminals coming back to life, and when turned into one of the creatures he's tracking, discovers the real use behind the events and sets out to stop them before more become like him. Rather fun and enjoyable 80s cheese-fest, mixing in the zombie genre with some police-partner-assignment action movie and managing to make it work, although it's entry as a normal, traditional zombie movie is obviously in question. Not that it really matters, having enough action in several great chases and shootouts to really overcome that flaw, and has enough of a sense of humor to be enjoyable without overbearing, though it does need some help from the villain who has a laughable motive and really could've done with some help here. Overall, though, it's not all that bad if you have a taste for this style.

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Aaah! Zombies!-When a group of friends are accidentally exposed to a strange virus from their beer-laced ice cream at a bowling alley, they quickly realize their superhuman strength and invulnerability makes it perfect for them to battle the hordes of infected people running around town, but a secret soon turns their world upside down. An ingenious new zombie comedy, which manages to invert the usual theme of the zombies being hunted down by the humans who are the main focus of the film to instead have it be about the zombies, who think they've acquired super-powers and treat the normal humans as the infected ones all along, and by switching it between black-and-white for the zombie view-point and a colorized look for the regular world viewpoint. Feels really unique and rather clever, intertwining the two stories together rather than separate films. Not really all that impressive in the gore department or zombie make-up areas, but there's a huge boatload of humor to go along with some gags so that it's not a total waste.

Roadkill-A group of friends touring Ireland for a re-acquaintance trip run afoul of a gang of gypsies during an accident and are soon stalked by a gigantic predatory bird as part of their revenge on the friends, forcing them to battle the vicious creature to get away alive. A nice new one from the Sci-Fi channel, pretty much a run-of-the-mill film that you will pretty much figure out pretty easily how it'll all go down. No real surprises, no real faults, but it's fun enough that it's got some pluses to keep it interesting at times and a couple minor flaws that'll make it lower on the podium in terms of ranking the films overall.

Into the Sun-A retired CIA agent teams up with a rookie to investigate the assassination of a radical political candidate and finds that both the Chinese and Japanese mafia heads are teaming up to control the underworld together and race to stop them before they start a massive war in the streets to do so. A decent enough Seagal effort, most notable only in the sense that it tends to merge together the crime families in the orient instead of having them wage war on each other with the heroes caught in the middle. A lot of plot, but it's handled respectably enough and never really becomes hard to follow or confusing, though it seems as if with all the different storylines going through it some streamlining should've been done here and there. Doesn't showcase any real action until the finale, though, so a lot of time goes by without any real battles or encounters, just a few quick snippets to remind us that it's supposed to be one all along. Really only for Seagal completists, his comeback has much more solid films overall.

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High Plains Invaders-A small Western town finds themselves under attack by a race of mutant alien insects looking for a rare chemical found in the area and try to protect themselves from the creatures before they kill them off to get at the chemical. A pretty decent Sci-Fi Channel original, nothing too bad here but this one met with a bit more flaws than normal. Rather, the continued storyline about the condemned man seeking repentance every single time he's together with the others during a break from the bug action is a little tiring, the continuous double-crossing gets old the fifth time it happens and the reasoning for the bugs' arrival is nice if slightly rushed and seems like an after-thought. Plus, with the continued placement of the survivor's attempts to get away from being trapped in a building, there's not a lot of attacks and confrontations and resorts more to them sneaking around without being seen than having the bugs do away with them, so the gore is almost gone and is rarely featured, a rather strange inclusion. Still, the main attack sequence is nicely handled, the creatures themselves look good and it's got enough action on the back-end to justify it, but it is a slightly-flawed effort.

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Divergence-A Hong Kong cop trying to work out the identity of a mysterious assassin on one of his cases finds that his long-lost girlfriend may be involved in the conspiracy and tries to win her back while taking down the madman. Wow, this is rare: a HK action film that's not any good at all. Pretty much everything you would expect in these films isn't that impressive: from the quantity of the action scenes to the utterly insipid chase scenes, only one shootout which isn't all that great (even though it's really the only highlight to the film) and two kung-fu fights without any real impressive maneuvers thrown or all-together innovative choreography. It instead spends more time with the haunted detective grieving over the girl which is just plain irritating, goes nowhere since the resolve is thrown in out of nowhere and it's not done with any kind of interest, leaving the entire middle section drained of any kind of energy, enthusiasm or excitement, making it a drama during these segments. Too bad, the plot had potential and it started off fine, but in the end, the first HK kung-fu film to stay away from.

[Fenril]

- Cul-de-sac. A pair of fleeing (and badly wounded) bank robbers take refuge in the seaside caste of a very neurotic European couple. Their relationship soon trascends the usal hostage / captor situation and starts escalating into something at once perverse and darkly funny....

A somewhat forgotten thriller / dark comedy combo from Roman Polanski, has all of his trademark qualities (obsessed yet fascinating characters, a pervasively paranoid atmosphere, inspired dialogue), mixed with the kind of subersive humor he would also display in "The fearless vampire killers".

I also attended a showing of several episodes from the spanish tv series "Historias para no dormir" (aka Tales to keep you awake) that concluded with three episodes from the latest incarnation, "Películas para no dormir" (aka Films to keep you awake).

These last are basically the spanish answer to the american Masters of horror / Fear itself, so listing them here seems appropiate:

- Cuento de navidad (Xmas tale). Five children in the late 80's find a bank robbber in a Santa Claus suit literally lying on a ditch, barely alive. Rather than call the police and spoil all the fun, the kids decide to torture her while trying to extract the location of her buried loot. But then they take things too far when they decide to enact a voodoo ritual from a shlocky zombie movie. A ritual that proves far too effective...

The best of these three entries, a nasty tale that reminded me a lot of "Tales from the crypt" in its politically incorrect characters and a fairly gory last act.

- Regreso a Moira (Spectre). An old man returns to the small town he grew up in while reminishing of a bewitching woman he met in his teenage years. A woman whose untimely death he had a hand in...

Mostly effective ghost story, through a subplot with the main character's deceased wife feels gratitous (it goes nowhere, either). Pretty good twist ending, too.

- Adivina quien soy (A real friend). A young girl, whose late-night working mother often leaves her alone, grows addicted to horror movies and starts adopting several iconic characters (Leatherface and Nosferatu among them) as her imaginary friends. Lately, however, she's been hanging out with a vampire who may not be so imaginary...

Very weird in that it never decides who is the focus of the story, the girl or her mother. A really confusing last scene doesn't help matters, either.

For the record, the remaining episodes are, respectively: Para entrar a vivir (To let); La culpa (Blame); and La habitación del niño (The baby's room).

The original tv series and it's first revival were quite good, too.

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Never Say Die-A retired commando is thrust back into action to protect a woman who escaped from a psychotic former comrade's cult-like commune and tries to stop him before he carries out a deadly plan on the people nearby. Surprisingly fun actioner, built on the foundations of a rock-solid storyline that simply allows for tons of action confrontations one after another, which are surprisingly nearly all well-done except for a few of the briefer moments in the jungle, but a commando raid on the compound, a shoot-out in a crowded church with hostages and a motorboat chase are all incredibly well-done and manage to make it exciting all the way through. A fast pace, not a lot of down-time or weak sequences, lots of things blowing up, this was pretty fun and a lot more enjoyable.

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Mutants-While investigating her brother's disappearance, a woman and her father find that the sugar company they both work for is developing a new strain that will increase the normal addictive qualities but turns it's victims into rage-filled zombies and race to stop them before he becomes a new test subject. One of the most paltry, pathetic zombie movies ever devised, mostly due to the fact that the strain of calling these creatures zombies is so strong that it’s almost an insult to the rest of the genre. These are the infected ’28 Days Later’ style zombies, so that automatically earns derision for the sheer inclusion of it but also because the zombies are literally in the film for twenty minutes, with the rest of the film taken up in flashback about how we’ve come to where we are. It’s stupid, lame and doesn’t have anything worthwhile going on, barely qualifying as a horror film even during these segments, forget about delivering anything of substance or entertainment value. This one was just plain terrible.

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Hybrid-After a freak accident, a blind man is given a radical experimental treatment where wolf eyes are transplanted in to replace them, but driven by flashbacks of the wolf's previous life, he goes on the run with it's Native American owner looking for peace and to escape the company who engineered the transplant process. Ugh, utterly pitiful. No horror, no monster, no bloodshed, no action, nothing at all that happens. Just a series of scenes with a guy with wolf-eye contact lenses starring into space with blue-tinged scenes of wolves running free in the wild for minutes on end constitutes the result of action in this one. Utterly devoid of entertainment value at all.

Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster-The android pilot of a space flight looking into a series of strange explosions on previous voyages finds a race of alien beings at the center looking to use Earth women in a breeding program to repopulate their planet, and once they're foiled, must deal with their monstrous pet creature to save the world. Outrageously fun and cheesy monster movie from the 60s, filled with just the right amount of exploitation to be relevant but still manages to be fun regardless. The plot makes no sense (it's not Frankenstein as we're used to seeing him, as you can tell from the plot description for starters) and the cheese does make it seem a little lower-budget than it should be, but it's still a good, cheesy time.

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Command Performance-A musician conducting a concert at a Russian celebration defends the President and his family from Communist Terrorists looking for revenge from past injustices. Typical Sudden Death/Die Hard rip-off, although that should be taken to mean a lot of praise for the movie itself since those are quality films to rip-off in the first place, and that allows for a lot to go on in here. From a series of impressive shoot-outs and hand-to-hand brawling, it stays interesting and never really lets up the pace, which is what's most important here anyway, and a few well-placed explosions certainly help out as well. The storyline seems a mess, especially as to the reasons why Dolph is allowed to be a fighter of his caliber, and the political motivations just seem lost in a sea of patriotic rambling, but it's not detrimental like it normally is and is overall a fine addition to Lundgren's new revival.

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Fulltime Killer-A hot-shot assassin starts a vicious rivalry with a skilled pro looking to retire from the business, and once getting his girlfriend involved in the proceedings, takes his challenge in earnest and hunts him down to put an end to it all. Not too bad of an Action film, containing a couple of rather nice action scenes of the two going about their business and doing so in completely different fashion, one brash and arrogant with the other cold and calculated. These, as well as the two interfering in each other's assignments make up for the best parts of the film, but it's muddled down in a series of utterly boring conversations as the three principals involved talk about what's going on with their romance over signaling it through the action, making for long, long periods of dullness. It's action scenes are marvelous, the rest is really taxing to get through.

The Executioner-A ninja-trained-assassin working for the Japanese Mafia works with several underlings to stop an international criminal gang from moving in on their territory. One of Sonny Chiba's finer efforts, though that's not really saying much since the common thread involved in many of his films rears it's ugly head here in the form of utterly boring fight scenes that really aren't that impressive. They're slow, they're clunky and don't really have any flow or rhythm to them and tend to show him getting into positions and counters rather than showing off any moves or display of physical prowess. They're brutal and hard-hitting, but that's about it, and don't really have any sort of physical wonder that the HK films use. Beyond that, the pace allows for a lot of confrontations so it may not look pretty but there's a lot of stuff going on, it's never really boring and the injections of humor work to it's advantage at times. Could use work but overall it's not too bad.